“Don’t look for a partner who is eye candy. Look for a partner who is soul food.” ~Karen Salmansohn
Stepping into the dating world when you are over 40 can be quite daunting. It is believed that the older people are, there are less fish in the sea. However, it is important to remember that all you need to do is find one mate. And even there may be less fish in the sea, the one waiting for you may just be right there – literally waiting. That means you want to go out there and be fearless, and put yourself out there.
However, before you do just that, there are 5 tips you will want to make the best use of when you are dating over 40 years of age:
1. You Have Baggage? Embrace It
One of the things that those who are over 40 are afraid of when they go out into the dating world is that they fear that they will not be wanted because of the fact that they have baggage. Here are a few things to remember. If you are feeling this way, anyone who is around the same age as you will also have baggage and that is a guarantee. Secondly, the baggage you have has made you grown and shaped who you are today. Baggage also means you have had many life experiences. And that is quite attractive for a potential mate that is the same age.
2. Be Picky But Not Too Picky
You most definitely do not want to settle for someone who doesn’t deserve you. That means if you hook up with someone who doesn’t treat you well, you should not accept that. However, there is no such thing as perfection. Know your dealbreakers – those things that are unacceptable to you. But also remember that everyone has their flaws and if the flaws outweigh the negatives (and this person isn’t toxic) then you might be able to work with a potential partner.
3. Stay Away From Dating Someone Who Reminds You Of An Ex
The temptation may be there when it comes to dating someone who reminds you of an ex because the familiarity may bring you security which is a false sense. However, you will want to not fall into that temptation. Remember why you had split up with your ex in the first place. History could potentially repeat itself.
4. Consider Hiring A Dating Coach
If you are truly afraid to go out in the dating world but at the same time you want to do it to move past your comfort zone, then the best thing to do is to hire a dating coach. You may feel awkward being out in the dating world which is not overly familiar to you. A dating coach can help answer the questions and concerns you have, and guide you on what to do when you are ready to start dating. (Note: The QueenBeeing coaches are each skilled as dating coaches as well and can help you to avoid a toxic relationship! Schedule your appointment now!)
5. Be Transparent On Your Dating Profile
You want to make sure that you are not hiding anything when you are setting up your dating profile. If you have children from a previous relationship, for instance, that needs to be included. And be sure to use a current profile picture as well. Not from 5 years ago when you had more hair or believed that you appeared better.
And remember, we are our own harshest critics. What you may not find attractive about yourself, a potential mate will find attractive. You can do it, and most of all believe in yourself.