How do you know when you’re done having kids? Not every woman wants kids, and that’s totally okay. But for those who do, some struggle to know for sure when they’re “done” having kids. Is there a certain number? Do you just sort of “know” when you’re done? It differs for different women, but there are certain signs you can watch for that seem to be common to all moms when they finally decide they’re “done” having kids.
There are plenty of women that only want to have one child by choice – those are the “one and done” kind of moms. We can all respect that. But then there are those women who say they want 7 kids – or more. Obviously, your desired number of kids will largely depend on what you can handle financially, physically, emotionally, and mentally.
Of course, some women want to have a specific number of kids but end up having to adjust to a higher or lower number – based a whole bunch of other factors. For example, if a mom wanted to originally have 3 kids but elects to stop at 2 because her budget won’t cover a third. Or a mom who only has one because she has a risky or extremely traumatic childbirth – or the one who has to use a fertility drug to get pregnant and ends up with triplets when she only wanted one.
But in any case, there are 3 factors that will clearly indicate that a woman is finished having kids. Let’s look at those right now.
1. She Still Wants To Have Baby Cuddles But Not From Her Own – This mom loves babies, and wants to hold any new babies that are coming into the family through her cousins or siblings. But has no desire to go through the newborn, baby, and toddler phases again. In other words, she makes it clear that she wants to cuddle babies that belong to other parents only.
2. She Is Extremely Overwhelmed – Any time a mom has extremely overwhelmed with juggling the needs of her kids to the point that she is consistently having to put her own needs on the back burner, then she cannot even think of bringing more babies into the family. And, she knows this and will not even want to attempt it again. Sometimes if a mom has 3 kids but is having to juggle their needs around then she has bitten off more than she had chewed. Or, unfortunately, if a mom only has 2 kids but one of them has special needs, this also applies. She is finished.
3. She Feels Complete – This type of mom may not be extremely overwhelmed but she has no desire to have any more kids because she feels that her family is complete. And, she knows this deep down and she is satisfied with how many kids she has because again, she feels that her family is complete. There is no baby-fever whatsoever with this mom.
However, it is important to note that years down the road after feeling this way, this mom may end up changing how she feels and may want to add one more baby into the mix. Many times this does happen and these moms end up forgetting what the newborn and baby phase entails so there is some regret. Other times, the mom may have this feeling of not being complete again but ends up not giving into it because of knowing that her older kids need her support for then they are in high school or going to college. This mom also knows that she can finally live her dreams and travel which means adding a baby to the mix again will only put that on hold, once again.
But don’t be surprised when the mom is totally done having kids – she will likely keep her word and have her tubes tied. She has a life of her own to nurture as well!
So how about you? Are you “done” yet, and if so, how did you know you were done having kids? If not, what do you expect will let you know you’re done?
